The Willows Read online

  The Willows

  Title Page

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Epilogue

  The Willows

  By:

  Krystal George

  Copyright 2012 by Krystal George

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced without written permission from the author.

  For information, you can reach the author at: [email protected]

  Dedication:

  For my Navy Federal Family for always believing in me and supporting me. Your encouragement and faith in me are priceless.

  For Regina Wamba Rasmussen for creating me a truly incredible cover and bringing Evie to life in a vibrant and mesmerizing way. Thank you mariix-stock.deviantart.com for use of your wonderful stock!

  For my new family. Thank you for accepting me into your lives and into your hearts. I love you all endlessly.

  For my old family. Thank you for always supporting me no matter what sorts of mischievousness I get myself into.

  For Steve and Hailey. Thank you for giving Chloe and me a new start and working to build a life and family with us.

  And always, for Chloe. You are the light of my heart. Everything good I do, I do it for you. Mommy loves you.

  Chapter One

  There was blood on my hands.

  My eyes stared, fixated on the red streaks as tiny rivulets splattered on to the ground at my feet. It was warm and sticky as it dripped through my fingers and just as fast as the bloodlust had hit me, it was gone. In its place was a nauseated feeling made worse by the metallic scent perfuming the air around me.

  I hadn’t always been this way. There was a time when I had normal feelings, normal wants, and normal needs. Then the accident happened and with it had come the emptiness; the feeling of numbness that never quite went away. At least it hadn’t, until him.

  I backed away from the body laid before me, mortified by what I had done, by what I had been doing. Who was I? What happened to me? What had I become? The answers screamed through my mind, threatening what little sanity I had left. I had to get away. I had to run, and running, I let my mind remember what it had felt like to be human…

  September

  “I’m so sorry for your loss.”

  It was the same words, uttered over and over again until I wanted to scream. On either side of me, my brother’s Mason and Jackson seemed so gracious and thankful. It irritated me that they weren’t more irritated. I mean, I knew people probably were sorry, but seriously, who can honestly say they know what we are going through? Every person reacts differently, plus I had never even seen half of these people. Why was it that when people died, they were more popular than when they were alive? It just wasn’t right.

  An elderly man walked over to us. He stopped at Jackson first and held out his hand. Jackson, his eyes red rimmed and swollen, shook the man’s hand and murmured his thanks to the man’s whispered condolences. When he turned to me, I suppressed the desire to roll my eyes. Once again I didn’t recognize him. Once again I gritted my teeth when he leaned forward to hug me. Another question popped into my head, why do people shake hands with the boys and hug the girls? It was creepy, really, if you thought about it.

  “Your parents were wonderful people, dear,” he whispered into my ear. His breath smelled of stale coffee and tobacco and I couldn’t help the shiver of disgust that worked its way up my spine. Luckily, he had already moved on to Mason and was slowly shaking his hand and offering the same condolences.

  “You could try to be a little more respectful.”

  My jaw dropped at Jackson’s words and I turned and glared at him. “I am.” I insisted stubbornly. I really didn’t need someone telling me how I should be acting, especially not my little brother.

  He shook his head and rolled his shoulders. “Whatever.”

  I gritted my teeth again. It was hard enough to get through the day without that added stress of someone judging me. It wasn’t my fault I felt the way I did. I wasn’t even sure how I felt to be honest. It was more that I didn’t really feel anything.

  “Hey babe, how are you holding up?”

  I was so irritated with my brother that I didn’t even notice my boyfriend Landon, until he was pulling me close into a hug. “I’m fine,” I answered, pushing him away from me.

  He raised his eyebrows at my reaction and I sighed in frustration. Normally I would have been happy in his embrace. We’d been dating for almost a year. Something had changed since the news of the accident though, and it was like all emotion inside of me just got cut off. I was numb.

  “O-kay,” he said, clearly confused by my reaction.

  My two best friends, Jane and Emma, were behind him and I wasn’t oblivious to the look they exchanged. They had known me almost all of my life and I knew they were concerned. I couldn’t really blame them. I was too. In all reality, this wasn’t like me at all. I just didn’t know what to do to fix it.

  Just then, the pastor saved me from having to say anything else. “It’s just about time.”

  Mason nodded and turned expectantly to Jackson and me. “Are you guys ready?”

  I took a deep breath and exhaled before nodding. “You guys better go and get a seat,” I said to my friends. Landon leaned in and kissed me on my cheek before I had the chance to move away from him. A gesture like that used to give me the tingles, in a good way, now it gave me the tingles in a very irritated please don’t touch me kind of way.

  “We’ll see you after, Evie,” Jane leaned toward me and squeezed my hand, “we’re here for you.”

  Emma smiled and I tried to return the expression, but I knew it fell flat. Landon waited for them to go ahead of him and then started to follow them inside the chapel before Jackson stopped him.

  “Hey, Landon?”

  He turned and looked at him, “yeah?”

  “Could you guys please try and find Piper and sit by her? I didn’t see her come in and I am worried about her.”

  Landon nodded and then the three of them walked into the small room. Piper was Jackson’s on again off again girlfriend. I had thought that they were off again, but by his concern, I figured that maybe I was wrong and they were on again. Who knew with everything else going on.

  “After you,” the pastor gestured to us and one by one, with Mason in the lead, we walked down the aisle to take our place on the front pew.

  Okay, so I have to admit that churches make me uncomfortable. It’s not that I have a problem with religion or anything like that, it’s just that our parents hadn’t raised us that way. There was an occasional service we attended when we were younger if we stayed the night with a friend who went to church, but for the most part, it wasn’t something I was familiar with at all.

  Not only that, but I sort of figured that the first time I walked down the aisle of a church with almost every eye staring at me, it would be because I was dressed all in white with a veil hanging down my back and a bouquet in my hands. In a million years I never would have pictured walking down the aisle like this.

  The floors were wooden and my barely worn heels made clicking sounds as I followed closely behind Mason. In the silence around us, it seemed like the sound was even more amplified and it began to pound in rhythm with my heartbeat. Thump, thump, thump. Click, click, click. I was wearing a black skirt with a black s
hirt that had little white and pink flowers all over it. I shivered when I sat down against the cool wooden bench and wished I had thought to bring a sweater or jacket with me. Strange the things you think about when your world was being turned upside down.

  When the pastor began to talk, I decided that I was the most ungrateful heartless person in the entire world. No matter how hard I tried, I could not pay attention to him. My mind kept wandering in random directions. I noticed that right next to my knee, the wood of the bench had a heart shaped knot in it. I noticed that, next to me, Mason’s hairline was uneven. On the other side of me, I noticed that Jackson had a tissue gripped tight in a ball inside of his closed fist and that every few seconds he would clench and unclench his fingers around it.

  After my immediate area was inspected, I moved on to the front of the church. The tapestries hanging from the walls were faded. Not only were they faded, but they were frayed at the edges. This saddened me. Were we so desperate to find someone to bury our parents that we had to choose a church that was so obviously struggling? At least they were struggling enough that they couldn’t afford their upkeep.

  I heard the pastor say “Evelyn” and I looked up automatically. It took me a few moments to realize that he wasn’t talking to me but was actually talking about me. He was talking about all of us and how Mason had chosen to leave school in order to take care of his two siblings. I turned then, and studied my brother. He hadn’t told me he was leaving school. I thought about it harder. Actually I didn’t even remember talking about what would happen to Jackson and me now that our parents were gone.

  Mason was looking ahead, just as I should be doing, but when he sensed me watching him, he turned and raised his eyebrows in question. I shrugged, not wanting to get into a whispering conversation with him, but knowing what he was willing to give up for us, sort of made me look at him differently.

  Jackson nudged me, and I spun around in my seat, facing forward just as the pastor led us all in a closing prayer. I closed my eyes and lowered my head, but mostly I just chewed on my bottom lip and waited for the ‘amen’. When it finally came, I stood up, relieved that this part was over.

  “Seriously Evie, what’s your problem?” Jackson asked softly.

  I shook my head, “I wish I knew.”

  We were like that, my brothers and I. Mostly we always knew what was going on with each other, kind of like sixth sense so I knew what he was asking me. Where were my emotions? Where was my focus? Where was I?

  He hugged me close and then looked up at Mason over my shoulder. “You’re leaving school?”

  It was the same question I had for him so I turned toward him, as I was just as curious for his answer. He gulped and took a deep breath, “look guys, there isn’t really another option.”

  “Oh, come on. You’ve earned it Mason. You can’t just throw away a whole year of college.”

  I turned back to Jackson, it was my turn to raise my brows, did my baby brother just sound more grown up than me?

  “Who else is supposed to take care of you guys?”

  Jackson laughed bitterly, “seriously? It’s not like we are babies. Evie’s seventeen and I’m sixteen, I’m pretty sure we won’t burn the house down.”

  I turned back to Mason, it felt like I was at a tennis match with the constant back and forth between them. He nodded slowly, "I know, that's not what I'm trying to say."

  Jackson groaned and threw his arms up in the air, "you can't do this. Mom and dad would have wanted you to stay in school." He walked up to Mason and put his hands on his shoulders, "they were so proud of you."

  Mason gulped and leaned his head back. I thought I saw tears in his eyes, but when he looked at me, they were clear. "What do you think about all this Evie?"

  I raised my eyebrows. Crap! I so didn't want to be in the middle of this. "I, um, I'm not sure."

  Mason smiled slightly because Jackson rolled his eyes. "Come on, Evelyn, voice an opinion. You know I'm right."

  Before I could answer, Mason hugged me and kissed the side of my hair. "It's okay, Evie, now isn't the time anyways. There are people waiting for us downstairs." With one arm wrapped around me, he used his other to pull Jackson close, "we'll talk more about this later, I promise."

  Jackson sighed, but nodded. "Fine." Mason walked through the now deserted chapel and as soon as he was out of ear shot, Jackson turned and punched me in my arm.

  "Ow," I mumbled, rubbing the spot he had hit.

  "What the hell is wrong with you?"

  "I don't know, Jack. Just leave me alone."

  I spun and took a few steps, walking quickly to get away from him. I was tired of trying to answer this question when I didn't even know the answer myself. I hugged my arms around my chest and wished I could cry, that I could scream, or laugh, or just lose it, but I just couldn't. The emptiness wouldn't let me.

  It didn't take long for Jackson to catch up with me and he grabbed my shoulder. "Evie, wait." He cursed under his breath and I let him turn me around, chewing on my bottom lip. "I'm sorry." He ran his hand through his hair and let out a breath. "Everything is just so fucked up right now."

  I gulped. "I know it is," I whispered.

  "We can't let Mason quit school. Mom and dad would be furious if he did." He sat on the closest pew and lowered his head onto the back of the one in front of him. After a few seconds, he turned so that his face was towards me. "Help me convince him that we don't need him home with us."

  My eyes began to sting and for a moment I was sure the tears were finally going to fall, but stubbornly, they remained dry. I sighed, feeling exhausted, and nodded. "Fine, we'll talk to him later, 'kay?"

  He smiled and nodded before standing up. "Let's get downstairs before they come looking for us."

  Together, but not talking, we made our way downstairs. The room was already filled with people eating and talking. Proving that it wouldn't take long for them to move on with their lives. I was pretty sure some of them had already forgotten why they had come here in the first place.

  I sunk gratefully into an empty chair at the table my friends had taken over. They had been laughing about something and when I arrived, they all stopped suddenly and cleared their throats awkwardly. I wanted to tell them that it was fine. It didn't matter to me that they were amongst those who were already moving on, but I was just too tired to say anything.

  Landon leaned over and tried kissing me, but I moved my head, causing the kiss to land somewhere between my cheek and my ear. He laughed uncomfortably and sat back in his chair. Then there was silence. Awkward hideous silence.

  It was Emma who broke it. "Well that answers that question," she said cryptically.

  My friends all turned and looked toward something behind me. "What?" I asked, only mildly curious.

  "Piper," Jane whispered.

  I sat up straighter. "What about her?"

  "They were wondering if Jackson and Piper were back together." Landon answered, clearly not interested.

  I laughed, "I'm guessing they are?"

  To my surprise, Jane shook her head and whispered, "I don't think so. Look."

  Trying not to be obvious, I turned in my chair. Piper was behind us, she was smiling, she was totally participating in some highly inappropriate PDA and she most definitely was not with my brother.

  "Who the hell is that?" I whispered. Even whispered, it sounded loud to my ears and a few people from the tables next to us looked over at me curiously.

  Jane shrugged and whispered back, "no clue."

  I watched, a nauseated feeling starting in the pit of my stomach, as the guy Piper was with leaned closer and whispered in her ear. She giggled and moved closer to him. I stood up, my chair crashing to the floor behind me. "That's just... sick."

  At that point, I didn't even care if I was making a scene. I felt like I was going to spew right there in the middle of the buffet the ladies of the church had set out. The room was starting to spin and I was seeing red. My brother, my sweet little brother, didn't d
eserve that. How dare she bring someone else to our parents funeral? It just wasn't right.

  "Babe, calm down." Landon whispered, standing up and trying to put his arms around me.

  "How can you just stand there, like's it's okay?" I screamed at him.

  Mason and Jackson made their way through the crowds of people and each one of them put an arm around me. "Come on, Evie, why don't we get home?" Mason asked, "it's been a long day."

  I turned, sad eyes on Jackson, "I'm so sorry Jack."

  He looked at me, confused, but didn't say anything. "It's going to be okay Evie. You just need to rest."

  Jane and Emma were just standing there, looking at me like they didn't even know me. So much for always being there. Why wasn't anyone doing anything? Someone could have said something to Piper.

  "I'm fine," I whispered, all of the furious energy seeping out of me again, "I just have a headache."

  "Landon, can you help Jackson get Evie out to the car?" Mason asked, moving to drape my arm around Landon's neck.

  I jumped back. "No." They all looked at me confused and I took a deep breath. "I can do it. I'll just call you later."

  Pain flickered in Landon's eyes, but he nodded, taking a few steps back away from me. Emma moved forward and put her hand on Landon's arm, comforting him, but I didn't even care. I just wanted to go home. I just wanted to go to sleep.

  Jackson walked with me through the crowds still standing there watching me, whispering behind their hands to one another. If I wasn't so tired, I'd be irritated. How dare they judge me? Instead, I walked, my head lowered and my dark hair hanging in a curtain around my face, providing some small bit of privacy for me. Hiding the fact that my hazel eyes were dry and empty.

  When we got to the car, Jackson opened the back door for me and I curled up in a ball, laying on the seat under a blanket. I was shivering. I tired to thank my brother, but I was just so tired. Once closed, I just couldn't open my eyes again. I vaguely remember the light coming on when the driver's side door opened and Mason turning the key in the ignition, but that was about it. In the morning, when I woke up in my bed, I couldn't even remember how I got there.